Signs that your aging parent needs help
By: Paul Lorrah
By: Paul Lorrah
Whether mail is stacking up, food is spoiled or something just seems out of the ordinary, it’s important to be aware of the signs that your aging parents may need help.
If you have aging parents, you've probably realized that age sneaks up on everyone and maybe Mom and Dad seemed fine the last time that you have visited but this time, not so much. Physical and mental health decline often surprises family members, especially if aging parents seemed fine on the last visit. Sometimes it's difficult for family members to admit that their aging parents need help. The key is to be aware of the small signs or problems that something may be wrong, so that your family can properly prepare for the future.
Our experts will provide some guidance on how to not only spot common problems.
How to Notice There’s A Problem With Your Aging Parents:
Aging parents and their children are often in denial that there is a problem. “It’s often hard for parents to admit that they need help, and no one wants to lose their independence”. “But daily living tasks will sometimes get to be too much as we age, and it’s important for family members and loved ones to step up and address the problem when this happen, even if it is painful. The problems will not go away and usually need to be addressed in a timely manner.”
The burden often falls on the family to recognize the signs that an aging parent might need help with daily living tasks. This doesn’t always mean that your loved one has to go to assisted living or a nursing home [but realistically it may]. Usually help starts with some extra care in their home environment. And if they’re not willing to admit it, there are signs that your elderly parent needs help.
Aging parents and their children are often in denial that there is a problem. “It’s often hard for parents to admit that they need help, and no one wants to lose their independence”. “But daily living tasks will sometimes get to be too much as we age, and it’s important for family members and loved ones to step up and address the problem when this happen, even if it is painful. The problems will not go away and usually need to be addressed in a timely manner.”
The burden often falls on the family to recognize the signs that an aging parent might need help with daily living tasks. This doesn’t always mean that your loved one has to go to assisted living or a nursing home [but realistically it may]. Usually help starts with some extra care in their home environment. And if they’re not willing to admit it, there are signs that your elderly parent needs help.
You can usually spot problems the minute you drive up to your loved one’s house:
“There are a whole bunch of warning signs that are easy to spot. For example... the exterior of the house looks un-cared for, the driveway or the walkway isn’t shoveled or newspapers are stacking up outside. Once you enter the home... mail is stacking up, the house isn’t as clean as normal or has an odor. You can usually tell when something is "off’.”
“There are a whole bunch of warning signs that are easy to spot. For example... the exterior of the house looks un-cared for, the driveway or the walkway isn’t shoveled or newspapers are stacking up outside. Once you enter the home... mail is stacking up, the house isn’t as clean as normal or has an odor. You can usually tell when something is "off’.”
Since a health crisis in the elderly can escalate quickly and catch everyone involved off guard, it’s important to not ignore signs that something may be wrong. Ideally, families will have conversations with their children or loved ones about getting their affairs in order and end of life care well in advance of having any issues but fail to discuss preparing for care needs as they age.
Here are some signs to look for when visiting aging loved ones:
- House and yard need care / maintenance
- Disheveled clothing
- Broken appliances
- Changes in mood or extreme mood swings
- Spoiled / expired groceries that don’t get thrown away
- Poor personal hygiene
- Cluttered, dirty and/or disorganized house
- Depressed or low energy temperament
- Unexplained bruising
- Trouble getting up from a seated position
- Missing important appointments
- Uncertainty and confusion when performing once-familiar tasks
- Forgetfulness
- Poor diet or weight loss
- Late payment notices, bounced checks and calls from collections
- Loss of interest in hobbies and activities
- Forgetting to take medications
- Unexplained dents or scratches on car
If health or happiness seems to be compromised, it’s time to have a conversation and address problems, whether it’s finding in-home care, an assisted living community or skilled nursing. It’s important to find the right care options for each unique family situation.
This then opens the door to the next conversation... How Will We Pay For The Care That Our Loved One Needs.
Read more on that here
Read more on that here
If you have Questions about how to pay for your Loved ones care, contact us today, we can help. 855.471.6771
Author Paul Lorah is a Medicaid and Long Term Care Planning expert who has authored such books as "Planning and Paying for Long Term Care' and "How to Get Medicaid to Pay for Your Long Term Care Costs".
